| SJ's profileHARDKOREPhotosBlogLists |  Tools  Help |
|
September 02 RAHHOWS IT HANGINGGGGG! IM GONNA START UPDATING THIS SHIT TO KEEP YOU ALL UPDATED WITH WHATS GOING DOWN IN ENGLAND! I'LL NEED TO GIVE YOU MY NEW EMAIL ADDRESS AND SPACE::
EMAIL: HOPINGTHISWOULDTAKEYOUHOME@HOTMAIL.COM MSN SPACE: HTTP://YNMLABH3046.SPACES.LIVE.COM =) December 16 MY QUICK REFLECTION.NEW FOUND LOVES:
-MY SECRET LIFE
-THE 60'S AND 70'S -THE SEX PISTOLS -THE WHOLE DRAINPIPE PUNK ERA ENGLAND ISNT SO BAD IF YOU'RE DRUNK OUT OF YOUR MIND. SO MY LIFE HAS TAKEN QUITE A TURN. LOTS OF NEW THINGS THAT'VE CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD SINCE I'VE BEEN HERE. THIS IS JUST LEARNING THOUGH, AND I'VE LEARNT ALOT FROM MY MISTAKES THIS YEAR. MY LIFE IS ALL ABOUT DRAMA. WITHOUT DRAMA, THERES NOTHING. I MAKE DRAMA. I INFLICT DRAMA ON MYSELF, SO IT GETS ME INTO TROUBLE AND I MOAN ABOUT IT LATER. BUT HEY, THE WHOLE THING IS ENTERTAINING...FROM A DISTANCE. I'VE DONE ALOT OF BAD THINGS TO ONE PERSON HERE. ITS NOT BECAUSE I WANTED TROUBLE, BUT I WANTED DRAMA. I DIDNT BELIEVE THIS 'SOMETHING' WAS HAPPENING, AND IT WAS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. NOTHING WAS GOING WRONG EXCEPT FOR ME. AND I NOW REALIZE HOW SELFISH, NAIVE, AND IGNORANT I WAS. I WAS OBLIVIOUS TO WHAT WAS HAPPENING BECAUSE OF PAST EXPERIENCE. AND I ADMIT, I WAS REALLY AFRAID.
ANYONE WHO'S READING THIS PROBABLY DOESNT HAVE A CLUE OF WHAT OR MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHO IM TALKING ABOUT. ITS JUST A PERSON I SEE EVERY MORNING, FAKE A SMILE TO, AND PRETEND I DID NOTHING WRONG. WHEN REALLY I DID EVERYTHING WRONG.
HM, SO ANOTHER THING THATS HAPPENED, IS IM BECOMING A WORSE PERSON THAN I HAVE EVER BEEN BEFORE. NOT SO MUCH EMOTIONAL, JUST THE STUFF I DO. KAY KNOWS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. WHATS BEEN GOING ON IS REALLY BAD. PEOPLE HAVE RUBBED OFF ON ME MOST DEFINITELY, BUT IM NOT DOING ANYTHING BECAUSE THEY ARE. THEY'RE JUST LIVING PROOF THERES MORE TO LIFE..EVEN IF ITS SOMETHING BAD. I GUESS WE'RE ALL GONNA GET FUCKED UP ONCE IN A POINT OF OUR LIVES, ESPECIALLY SINCE WE'RE ALL GROWING UP STILL. ITS HARD TO EXPLAIN. I HATE THE FACT THAT EVERYONE DOESNT KNOW EVERYTHNG AND I HATE IT 100 MILLION TIMES MORE WHEN PEOPLE SAY 'OH YOU'RE SO FUCKING YOUNG YOU KNOW JACK SHIT'. IT IS TRUE, I ADMIT. BUT DONT FUCKING RUB IT IN BECAUSE YOU WERE JUST AS STUPID AND FUCKED UP AS MY GENERATION. I'M LIKE ONE OF THOSE ROCKER'S GIRLFRIENDS WHO'RE ALWAYS DRUNK, WITH A CIGARETTE AND A BOTTLE OF VODKA IN HER HAND. AND SHE'S ALWAYS SEEN WITH THE GUY WITH HIS ARM STREWN OVER HER SHOULDERS...SORTA LIKE KATE MOSS. PERFECT EXAMPLE. EXCEPT IM NOT THAT THIN AND PRETTY.
AND ANYHOW
WE'RE ALL LOOKING FOR SOMETHING NEW. ITS WHAT THE HUNGRY FEED ON. MY GENERATION SEARCHES THE GLOBE FOR SOMETHING WE HAVENT TRIED BEFORE. WE NEVER REFUSE INVITATION AND NEVER RESIST THE UNFAMILIAR. WE KEEP OUR MIND CLOSED, AND SUCK IN THE EXPERIENCE AND IF IT HURTS...YOU KNOW WHAT? ITS MOST PROBABLY WORTH IT. WE ALL HOPE AND DREAM AND NEVER BELIEVE THAT ANYTHING'LL HAPPEN FOR US LIKE IT DOES IN THE MOVIES. AND WHEN SOMETHING ACTUALLY DOES HAPPEN, YOU EXPECT IT TO FEEL DIFFERENT, MORE VISUAL...MORE REAL. WE SHOULD ALL BELIEVE IN PARADISE BECAUSE ITS NOT A PLACE YOU FIND, ITS A FEELING YOU FEEL FOR A MOMENT IN YOUR LIFE. AND WHEN YOU FIND THAT MOMENT, NOTHING'LL MAKE YOU CHANGE UNTIL YOU REALISE ITS GONNA LAST FOREVER. WANNA GO HOME BECAUSE THE WORST IS THE BEST THING THAT I EVER KNEW.
IVE HAD ENOUGH. November 08 <3 LATE NIGHTS AND JOINTS <3HMM, IVE HAD AN INTERESTING FEW WEEKS FULL OF THE SQUARE, SHOPPING, BURGER KING, AND LATE NIGHTS. THE SQUARE IS THE BEST THING =) BANDS, BEERRR, BOYS, BITCHEZ...LOL. I WENT THERE THIS RECENT FRIDAY WITH A BUNCH OF MY LADY FRIENDS (WHO I LOVE!!) AND SORT OF HUNG OUT THERE AND THEN FCKED OFF HOME AT LIKE 12:00. YES PHILIP, ALL I DO IS PARTY.
HMM, ON OTHER NOTES, BEFORE I TELL YOU ABOUT SATURDAY, HALF OF THIS GODDAMNNN TOWN WANTS TO BEAT ME UP ALREADY. LOL ITS ACTUALLY QUITE ENTERTAINING, WATCHING EVERYONE START ON ME. THEY DONT KNOW MY COUSIN THOUGH...AND IM NOT JUST USING IT TO SAY I HAVE 'CONNECTIONS'. BUT TRUST =) IF HE FINDS OUT ANYONE STARTS ON ME, HE'LL GO MENTAL. IVE ONLY JUST COME HERE, LOL, AND EVERYONE' PUTTING PRICES ON MY HEAD FOR NO REASON, BECAUSE I DONT CHAT SHIT HERE BECAUSE I KNOW IT'LL GE ME IN TROUBLE. SO FCK THE HATERS =) IVE ALWAYS GOT SOMETHING YOU CANT, WONT AND NEVER WILL HAVE. (FOR THOSE DUMBASSSES WHO DONT KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, JUST STOP THINKING AND PISSSS OFF).
SO SATURDAY WAS THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAYS THIS WEEK. LOL, SO THERES THIS GUY. LOL. WELL YOU KNOW ME, ALWAYS GOT A NEW GUY KUZ ONE AINT GOOD ENOUGH, OR ONE AINT NICE ENOUGH, ETC. IM A PIMP ACORDDING TO KATHY AND CHARLOTTA. BUT HEY, I WONT TALK ABOUT IT HERE BECAUSE SOMEONE MIGHT READ IT AND BEAT ME UP (SARCASM...) WELL ON SATURDAY, I WAS WITH THIS GUY AND ALL HIS FRIENDS, JUST MESSING AROUND, GETTING DRUNK AND WALKING TO SAINSBURYS (SHOPPING, SUPERMARKET THING) AND YEAH. SO THEN IN THE EVENING IT WAS FIREWORK NIGHT SO WE GOT SMOKED A JOINT BEFORE AND SAT UNDER THE FIREWORKS AND THAT WAS THAT. WELL IT WASNT JUST THAT, WE WALKED TO THE SQUARE AND THEN HAD ANOTHER JOINT AND THEN NATHAN PASSED OUT, AND IT WAS ONLY ME AND THIS GUY AWAKE, AND YEAH - BOTH ON THE VERGE OF PASSING OUT. FUN. AND THEN I CAME HOME AT LIKE 1:00. FUNFUN.
ANYWAYS, I MISS CHINA SO MUCH AND MISS ALL OF YOU PEOPLE. MY CLUBBERS AND THEN ALL THE NORMAL STRAIGHT EDGE PEOPLE. LOL...I MISS YOU ALL. EVEN THE PEOPLE WHO I HATE. DUDE IM GONNA GO BACK THERE KUZ ENGLAND IS REALLY SHIIT. AND I KNOW IVE SAID IT SO MANY TIMES BEFORE, BUT REALLY, ITS SO SHIT. EVERYTHINGS WRONG WITH IT. I MEAN WTF, ITS LIKE 35 RMB JUST FOR A 20 PACK OF CIGARETTES, AND I CAN EASILY GET LIKE 5p CIGARETTES IN CHINA. AND BEER? DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED..ITS SO MUCH MONEY AND I CANT FCKIN COPE! I HAVENT EVEN GOT CIGARETTES WITH ME AND IN CHINA I'D HAVE A FUCKIN 20 DECK A DAY. SO SCREW THIS, IM LEAVING ASAP. THE ONLY THING THATS GOOD IN ENGLAND IS MY LADIES, SOME GUYS AND FCKIN WEED.
RAWR..SO THERES NOTHING REALLY ELSE THAT HAPPENED..APART FROM THE FACT THAT IM IN SCHOOL AND BORED OUT OF MY MIND WITH A GUY BESIDE ME WHO KEEPS READING WHAT I WRITE (LOL LOVE YOU JAMES..LOL). HMM, YESTERDAY WAS FUN, CHAZ KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT LAST NIGHT THAT MADE IT FUN, TEEHEE. AND TOMORROW SHOULD BE GOOD, AND THURSDAY, AND FRIDAY. <3 August 24 RAWROKAY SO I WENT TO THE SQUARE THE OTHER DAY AND ANOTHER VENUE THE NIGHT BEFORE. RAD RAD RAD. ITS BASICALLY A VENUE WHERE LOCAL BANDS ROCK OUT AND THE PEEPS MOSH. ITS REAL NICE. AT THE SQUARE THEY HAD A 70-90s NIGHT, SO DANCING TO THAT WAS FUN N WE TOTALLY LET IT HANG LOOSE WHEN MICHAEL JACKSON CAME ON N FRANK SANATRA. THAT WAS GOOOOOD. BEST HIGHLIGHT FOR NOW EXCEPT FOR YESTERDAY AT KRISPY KREMES =)
SCHOOL STARTS SOON, WHICH SUCKS BALLS. THE SCHOOL IS GAY. EVERYTHING IN ENGLAND IS GAY..EXCEPT FOR THE THINGS THAT MATTER. HEHE, LIKE BAILEYS. BRAD GOT ME A LITTLE THING OF BAILEYS A FEW DAYS AGO. NOTHINGS LEFT OF THEM...EXCEPT THE LIL BOTTLES SCATTERED AROUND THE CAR. SPEAKING OF CARS, BRAD'S GETTING A NEW ONE SOON.
HMM ANTHONY COMES SOON, SO THAT'LL BE KEWL. KINDA STRANGE SEEING SOMETHING...ALIVE (LOL) IN MY TOWN. KUZ BASICALLY ANTHONY IS MY CONNECTION TO CHINA..SOMEONE I MET THERE, HAD HISTORY WITH THERE, AND LEFT THERE. BUT NOW HES COMING TO ENGLAND, SO IM GONNA SHIT A BRICK AND GO CRAZY. BUT ITS ALL GOOD =)
ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRM. WHAT ELSE? I THINK THATS ABOUT ALL THATS HAPPENED. I'LL UPDATE WHEN I DO SOMETHING ELSE INTERESTING..OR SOMETHING INTERESTING COMES ALONG. JOY. August 04 BLAHHMM SO STILL IN ENGLAND..HAHA. ITS GETTING A BIT BETTER...BUT IM STILL MISSIN CHINA LIKE MADD. STILL ON THE SUMMER HOLIDAYS...DECENTLY ENJOYABLE. EXCEPT RIGHT NOW IM HANGING WITH A YEAR YOUNGER PEOPLE...AND HONESTLY? THEY'RE PRETTY IMMATURE. I MEAN IM PRETTY GODDAMN MATURE FOR MY AGE...BUT THESE PEOPLE ARE PRETTY MUCH INSANE IMMATURE. SOME OF THE THINGS THEY DO, ITS LIKE 'DUDE WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?!'
I WENT TO A PARTY THE OTHER DAY...DIDNT EVEN KNOW THE GIRL BECAUSE ITS BRAD'S FRIENDS GIRLFRIEND. AND I ONLY KNOW 4 OF HIS FRIENDS. BUT HEY - BEER, WINE, FOOD - GOOD ENOUGH =) LAST NIGHT BRAD CAME AND GOT ME...JUST CRUISED FOR AWHILE. THIS GUY HAS MAD BASS IN HIS CAR. INSANNNNEEE. THEN WE WENT TO A PUB AKA A BAR, AND GOT KICKED OUT BECAUSE THE BOUNCER DUDE THOUGHT WE LOOKED YOUNG..WHICH IS TRUE, HAHA. BUT THEN AGAIN SOME OTHER OF OUR FRIENDS GOT KICKED OUT N THEY'RE ALL RANGING FROM 17 YRS OLD TO 23. SO THEN WE ALL WENT TO THE POUNDY (SKATE PARK) AND SMOKED SOME GOOD STUFF WHILST IAIN JARED AND NODDY BMX-ED. FUN.
I WENT TO AN AUTO LAST SATURDAY. THAT WAS THE ULTIMATE SHIT. THE AMOUNT OF BASS COMING FROM THOSE CARS WAS FUCKING RANDY. YOU COULD LITERALLY FEEL EVERYTHING VIBRATING. THE WHOLE GROUND AND ISH. TWAS GOOOOOOD. IM GOING TO RIP SPEED IN HARLOW ON THE 14TH OF AUGUST N MY FRIEND'S UNCLE HAS ABOUT 50 CARS THERE, WHICH IS PIMPIN. MORE BASS =)
HMM. SO I'LL UPDATE THIS BLOG SOON BECAUSE MY GODDAMN TIMES RUNNING OUT ON THE COMPUTER. N I'LL BE BACK WITH PICS FROM ENGLAND. JOY.
HOLLA July 21 ENGLAND.OKAY..SO I'M IN ENGLAND NOW. BEEN HERE FOR A MONTH, BUT HONESTLY, IT DOESNT FEEL LIKE ITS BEEN THAT LONG. IT FEELS AS THOUGH I'VE BEEN HERE LITERALLY, FOREVER. IM NOT SAYING I FEEL AT HOME HERE, BECAUSE THE TRUTH IS - I DONT FEEL LIKE THAT. I'D GIVE IT ALL UP TO GO BACK TO CHINA. THATS WHERE MY HOME IS. WHERE I WAS RAISED.
SO MY SCHOOL IS PRETTY MUCH SHIET, BUT I'D RATHER BE IN THIS SCHOOL THAN XIS. I HAVE TO COME HERE FOR 2 WEEKS TO GET TO KNOW EVERYONE AND THE CAMPUS, THEN I GET HOLIDAY. IVE BEEN PUT BACK 2 YEARS BECAUSE EVERYONES TAKING THEIR EXAMS, AND THE COURSE WORK IS LITERALLY AN OVERLOAD - 2 YEARS OF WORK IN 1 MONTH. SO THEY DROPPED ME BACK.
IVE MADE SOME GREAT FRIENDS HERE. I MEAN GREAT. THERES MONA (WHO I HAVE EVERYTHING IN COMMON WITH - WE HAVE A BAILEYS FETTISH), THERES BILLY, JAMIE.W, JAMIE.O, PAUL, JAMES, NODDY, IAN (HEHE, HEHE, HEHE), JARED, CHRIS.B, DANIELLE, AARON, JACK, GREG, CRAIG, CONNER, PETE, JIMMY, ROSS, JAY, LEWIS (COUSIN), ROB, CHARLEY (GIRL), JEFF (COUSIN), 2 DANS, LEWIS (LITTLE KIDD) AND MORE. HAHA, THEYRE MOSTLY GUYS. I CANT STAND GIRLS. SERIOUSLY.
ASIDE FROM THE SCHOOL, I CAN GET SERVED CIGARETTES AND ALCOHOL. WHICH IS AWESOME. 1) I CAN GET WHAT EVER I WANT. 2) PEOPLE ASK ME TO GET THEM STUFF, THEREFORE I ASK THEM FOR MONEY FOR MY TROUBLE. AND 3) THERE IS NO 3.
HMM. THERES A SKATE PARK CALLED THE POUNDY NEXT TO MY HOUSE. SO IM DOWN THERE EVERYDAY, WATCHING THE BMX-ERS (IAN THE BMX-ER, NODDY THE BMX-ER, JARED THE BMX-ER! (INSIDE JOKE WITH BILLY AND MONA)). THERES THE TOWN, WHICH HAS BASICALLY EVERYTHING. THERES A FOREST (GOING CAMPING TOO WITH A COUPLE FAT JOINTS, MUAHAHAHAHA).
I HOPE EVERYONE IN CHINA'S DOING OKAY. AND I HOPE XIS WILL TREAT YOU GOOD NEXT YEAR =)
AND A CERTAIN SHOUT OUT TO MY DEAREST KATIE =), IM GETTING A PUG SOON (HOPEFULLY) AND IM NAMING IT KAY, AND SORRY THE EMAILS HAVENT BEEN SENDING - IM STUCK WITH THE SHIET INTERNET AT SCHOOL THAT BLOCKS EVERYTHING. I FINALLY FOUND ME A GUY WHO SAYS RAD.
ENGLAND DEFINITELY SUCKS BALLS. BUT I LOVE RAIN..SO THERES ONE PLUS. BUT IT GODDAMN WELL SUCKS HERE. IM FCUKING LEAVING WITH MONA FOR COLLEGE. EASY AS THAT. BUT IM GLAD IM HERE, SLIGHTLY, BECAUSE I DIDNT LIKE SCHOOL IN CHINA.
BUT ANYWAYS, I CANT CHANGE ANYTHING FOR ANOTHER 2 OR 3 YEARS. AND THATS TOUGH LUCK. BUT IT WILL CHANGE. I HATE CHANGE.
May 26 FiiRST POSTALRIGHT, SO THIS IS MY FIRST POST ON MY SPACE. THE WHOLE SITE WAS IN CHINESE WHEN I FIRST LOGGED ON, AND I DIDNT UNDERSTAND A THING. BUT FINALLY AFTER CLICKING AROUND I CHANGED THE LANGUAGE BACK TO ENGLISH. NOTHING MUCH HAPPENED TODAY - WOKE UP, DID MY ROUTINE, WENT TO SCHOOL, STAYED AFTER SCHOOL AND THEN CAME HOME. UNEVENTFUL MORNING, UNEVENTFUL LUNCH, UNEVENTFUL AFTERNOON. BUT AFTERSCHOOL WAS ALRIGHT. OUR LITERATURE GROUP STAYED TO PRACTICE OUR DEBATE PLAY WHICH WE'RE PERFORMING TOMORROW. WE'RE PRETTY MUCH SCREWED BECAUSE WE DONT KNOW OUR LINES AND THE TRANSITION ISNT ALL TOO GOOD. THE BUS RIDE WAS ENTERTAINING WITH MICAH AND DAN -- JOKES AND RANDOM MOMENTS. IT FINALLY DAWNED ON ME THAT I'M LEAVING CHINA IN ABOUT 3 WEEKS. ITS HARD TO BELIEVE BECAUSE JUST A MONTH AGO I WAS BITCHING ABOUT HOW MUCH I HATE THIS PLACE AND HOW MUCH I WANNA LEAVE IT. BUT WHEN I REALLY SAT DOWN AND THOUGHT ABOUT IT, THERES TOO MUCH HERE THAT TIME CANT ERASE. IVE GROWN UP HERE...EXPERIENCED EVERYTHING DIFFERENTLY FROM WHAT AN AVERAGE TEENAGER HAS IN AMERICA OR EUROPE. EVERYTHINGS BEEN SO DIFFERENT...AND I HATE CHANGE. BUT WHEN I RECALL ALL THE BITCHING I DID, CHANGE SEEMS GOOD, HAHA. AS WELL AS POSITIVE SHIT THAT HAPPENED HERE, THERES ALL THAT NEGATIVE CRAP TOO...SO I GUESS ITS GOOD TO GET OUT AND START AGAIN. YEAH, SO I'LL BE PUTTING UP PICS IN AWHILE..PROBABLY IN A MONTH SINCE MY COMPUTER WITH ALL THE PICS AND SHIT ON IS BEING SHIPPED TO ENGLAND. I'LL TRY AND SEE WHAT I HAVE ON MY PHOTOBUCKET WHEN IT GETS BACK ONLINE. HMM, WELL I BORED YOU WITH A MEANINGLESS POST...BUT DONT WORRY, THING'S WILL START TO GET MORE DEEP...EVERYTHING ALWAYS ENDS UP GETTING DEEP.
|
|
|||||
|
|
